Let’s talk about trust

12 Jun

Trust, noun.

1.reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence.

2.confident expectation of something; hope.

3.confidence in the certainty of future payment for property or goods received; credit: to sell merchandise on trust.

4.a person on whom or thing on which one relies: God is my trust.

5.the condition of one to whom something has been entrusted.

;

This is not my first blog.

If it were still online my baby would have celebrated its 7th birthday, 2500 followers, and about 12,000 entries.

I miss it, terribly.

Originally, my decision to publish online came from the normal need of a teenage girl to expresses herself. The second decision to do it anonymously was to enable me freedom.
To complain, to gossip, to share without the fear of rejection, to get to know new people, to be me, the real me, not the masked one I walked around as (remember yourself at 17? not a lot of real going around at that age at high school)

At January I had a small get-together at my flat, I cooked, cleaned, had the camera going non-stop and basically I was busy having tons of fun. At some point, we weren’t so small all of a sudden. People brought friends, and so did they, it was hilarious, at about one wine bottle per person, the spirits were high. As it turns out, one of the guests recognize my home. Not all of it, but enough small stuff: the view from my window, the plates I had laid out with cakes, the photo on my bedroom wall that was the wallpaper for the blog.

I think I would be excited too if I met a blogger I like. Shit, it almost did happen to me and I almost flipped out. But I would NEVER out a person to his friends. The act itself seems so cruel to me. Said person had been “reading me” for 3 years, and knew I wrote anonymously for liberty, and I just don’t get it.

People got hurt.
Whether they were mentioned in the blog, whether they weren’t, whether they couldn’t understand why I didn’t tell them or whether they read my blog without knowing it was me (I can see the sting there).
Basically I got crushed, I felt like my every thought, on every subjects is there for my people to read. In a day, even my boss, who wasn’t even there and doesn’t know anyone at the party, asked me about it.

Sadly, I couldn’t take it and shut it down.
it was such a big part of my life, and had some major mile stones over there, the first time I drove a car (funniest video you can imagine), first time I moved out from my parents house, trips I took all over the world..

It’s been itching me for a some time now to write and share again.
I’m giving it another go.
I apologize to all my dearest friends I met online that I just disappeared without a word, this is a fresh start, Since I’m rolling pretty much at the same circles, I’m sure they will find me if they look. Love you guys. Really.

Here is for fresh starts:

Trust, noun.

1.reliance on the integrity, strength, ability, surety, etc., of a person or thing; confidence.

2.confident expectation of something; hope.

3.confidence in the certainty of future payment for property or goods received; credit: to sell merchandise on trust.

4.a person on whom or thing on which one relies: God is my trust.

5.the condition of one to whom something has been entrusted.

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6 Responses to “Let’s talk about trust”

  1. Gilly Gee June 12, 2012 at 07:43 #

    Well done brave lady!

    • Emma June 12, 2012 at 08:34 #

      thanks, let hope it all goes well this time around..

  2. TBM June 12, 2012 at 09:40 #

    I wish you luck! It is hard to make a break, but it sounds like yours was needed.

    • Emma June 14, 2012 at 21:54 #

      fingers crossed?

  3. carol aka traveller June 17, 2012 at 11:41 #

    that must have been very hard to. It’s hard to remain as anonymous as one would sometimes like on the net. I hope this blog will work out for you and give you the freedom you want

    • Emma June 17, 2012 at 11:45 #

      I hope so too.

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